back on the horse

sol

four days! three days? i certainly didn’t intend to skip any days of writing, let alone three-maybe-four. is it three? 25th, 26th, 27th. three! oof.

i’ve been feeling rundown & overwhelmed, & those two feelings tend to feed off of one another in me. more work means more exhaustion, being tired means feeling more stressed & desperate, more stress means everything hurts more, etc. boyfriend helped me take some lloyd dobbler advice, though, & “just get in a good mood.” he was nicer. he said, “put your all into everything you do today.” & it worked. i mean, it helps that i love my job, but two classes later, i felt better – physically & mentally – than i had all week. that same night, for parent-teacher conferences, i forewent the offer of a student translator & spoke Spanish with the parents who came alone. they were all encouraging & grateful, & complimented my skills (or at least my efforts). it felt good. i felt connected & involved, the way climbing a mountain makes me feel like part of the world. so often when i’m feeling overwhelmed or stressed or sick, i turn inward & make myself lonely. i forget how valuable it is to connect. the work is still there, the time is still short, my back still aches in the most annoying spot. but i can shift my perspective a bit, reevaluate my priorities. the road before me smooths out, just enough.

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2 thoughts on “back on the horse

  1. Yay! I’m so glad you’re back–I missed your posts!! I’m cheering for you to finish the mountain of writing strong. Get that boyfriend to rub that annoying spot and keep that road ahead of you smooth! Love all of the connections and analogies.

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